B i l l i a r d s b u r g

watch out!

Sat, 07 Jun 2008 18:40:02 -0500

we are DAYS AWAY from a BRAND NEW billiardsburg. we're getting rid of all the clunk you see here and unveiling a sleeker look and more features. we'll also be hosting a stupendous summer bbq at Redd's to celebrate. in keeping with the mission of billiardsburg, we encourage you to give us feedback on the tables we feature and the site itself, share your pool experiences, and join us at our events.

couples

Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:50:07 -0500

We rarely go to R Bar, but the other night Matt and I thought we'd check out what the 11222 had to offer-- you know, really see what's out there. It wasn't our first choice, but after being IGNORED at Boulevard Tavern, we thought we'd take our business to the potentially less douchy establishment along the BQE. Upon arriving, we were SERVED DRINKS (what a concept!) and managed to take over the pool table. We played a couple of games and won a game a piece. A guy then approached and asked if we wanted to play doubles with him and the girl we'll assume is his girlfriend. I normally would have refused, but I was feeling social, so I looked towards Matt. Matt, being the pissy bitch he tends to be 4-5 times a week, said he wanted nothing to do with it, so I told the couple that they should just play each other. The guy, looking disappointed, goes, "okay, but you play the winner--it's gonna be her" (smirking and motioning to his girlfriend). Great.

singles

Tue, 20 May 2008 22:47:05 -0500

You've had a long day. There's nothing more you'd like to do than shoot some pool, but the usual suspects aren't around. Here's some tips on how to get a game in solo (and enjoy it):

The break from the side.

Mon, 05 May 2008 11:57:40 -0500

My pop taught me all about breaking from the side rail. It gives you the best chance of sinking the eight off the break--the billiards equivalent of a hole-in-one. It's pretty risky, though. Your chance of a scratch on the break is increased as well. Generally, it is a good idea once you get it down. Plus, using the side rail to anchor your hand gives you greater stability with the least amount of friction, offering you more power on the break. Not everyone shares this opinion, however.

we're really just a bunch of grandpa indie kids

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 19:01:48 -0500

monday night, the billiardsburg crew (matt, mike, and myself) decided to hit up the breeders listening party at soundfix. advertised: free pbr, a raffle, free schwag, and a chance to hear the new album Mountain Battles (of course, we had all gotten the advance). we had nothing to do, so we strapped on our cons and got out there. and miraculously, we were ALL feeling good-- no one was being bitchy, depressed, and/or judgmental. i guess that's what happens when kim deal is involved.

tireless crusaders for all billiards-kind

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 14:17:56 -0500

is it naive or arrogant to assume that we here at billiardsburg are effecting change in the 11211? sure! but who cares? let's delude ourselves for a moment...

wake up and smell the lasagna

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 23:04:23 -0500

Our next party is coming up THIS TUESDAY (March 25th) at Legion, and we hope you're as excited about it as we are. We'll be cooking up an all-you-can-eat LASAGNA BUFFET*, so put on your eating pants! What else? Crazy Happy Hour deals until 10pm. And that top secret Billiardsburg drink special? $3 Checker Cab pints from our friends at the Chelsea Brewery. ALL THIS, PLUS FREE POOL AND BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

*The buffet will include a variety of lasagnas...a showcase, if you will. Vegetarians need not worry.

are you kidding me?

Thu, 13 Mar 2008 15:12:57 -0500

many moons ago karol and i sat down to discuss the reviews we would write here at billiardsburg. we decided, quite smartly, that the reviews should be incendiery so as to be engaging, and so the locals would rise up to defend their joint. we knew far in advance to the launch of this site that we could never spend enough time at each bar and could not capture anything beyond the general table condition, so we decided to rely on user content.

however, it seems a few of our visitors managed to miss the point completely. i imagine them to be the type so full of rage in their general life that they are the ones who start those WEIRD fights at those WEIRD bars. they are also the WEIRDOS who use "homo" or other inappropriate terms to demean people. we don't care for those types here.

please -- settle down kids. don't take things too seriously. sit back and ruminate for five minutes and realize that a poorly-written review on a third-rate website should not make you so angry and offensive.

just have fun. thanks.

Another stellar week

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 21:34:10 -0500

Details for our next party have been FINALIZED.
Mike spots MTV's John Norris at the Times New Viking show, STILL ROCKING.
New York Magazine gives a nod to both Barcade and Metropolitan in their Best of... issue. There is no category for Best Pool Table.
Alligator Lounge refelts. Matt is so excited, he rolls around under the table and is asked to leave.
Stuff white people like continues to be a topic of (white) conversation.
The Risotto Challenge is featured on Gothamist.

the little pool team that could

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 21:55:08 -0500

regular season for my pool league is over, and it's playoff time...that is, FOR THE TOP 14 TEAMS IN THE LEAGUE. the bottom ranked teams have the honor of playing in a losers tournament, the winner of which gets the wild-card slot in the playoffs. at the end of a disappointing season, my team was ranked #17...out of 18. i'm proud to say that i played a hand in making it happen.

the world is ending.

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 11:36:31 -0500

up is down, down is up. frogs are falling from the sky. WHAT is going on here? that's right-- last saturday, BARCADE REFELTED.

but enjoy it while it lasts-- i guarantee the first drink has already been spilled all over the table by a group of overly enthusiastic nyu kids.

...and I only had $40 on me.

Mon, 18 Feb 2008 14:30:01 -0500

The image of those cheap, ugly labels we made for the launch party were stuck in my head. "Manhattan is for tools," one of them said. It made me smile. There was something empowering about the hypocracy of it all--Karol and I were about to play a game in the Village.

N6 RIP

Sat, 09 Feb 2008 16:49:51 -0500

mike and i decided to hit up sweetwater this morning for a lazy saturday brunchy-brunch. as we sat in a cozy booth in the back deciding between eggs benedict and french toast, i realized-- before this place became a brasserie, it was sweetwater TAVERN, williamsburg's beloved punk rock bar, and the very room we were sitting in once contained what was likely the shittiest pool table in the 'Burg (circa 2003). still, i had to shed a tear.

mouse arrest

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 23:15:47 -0500

mice have moved into my fine williamsburg chateaux. it took them long enough-- 5 years!!! i mean, this is new york city! thanks for respecting my space for so long, guys! so i'm officially a prisoner in my own home. on top of that, league went poorly this week. we lost 15-0. like, we lost 15 consecutive games. this is true. whatever, these people were ACTUAL professionals. we're just there for the drink ticket, smoke breaks, and free food.

billares

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 10:12:12 -0500

The only way to survive blue Monday is to get the fuck out of New York for at least a few days. Go somewhere warm. I had the good fortune to be stuck with the obligation of meeting, in the most clandestine of fashions, a lover with whom I had created such a delectable scandal only weeks before. This brought me to a tiny little town in Mexico called Sayulita.